29/10/2015 0 Comments Sorting out worryLast weekend we had the honour and privilege of spending time with Paul Mitchell, one of only 22 Reiki Masters initiated by Hawayo Takata. On Saturday we attended a 'share day' where we were welcomed by the local Reiki community - a group of complete strangers who immediately felt like family due to our Reiki connection. Together we enjoyed a blissful afternoon giving and receiving of Reiki. Then on Sunday, Paul led a workshop reviewing and reflecting on the Reiki Principles and their meaning and impact on our lives. I found the following exercise so simple and effective that I thought it worth sharing. It's based on the first Usui Reiki principle of "Just for today do not worry". Step 1 – Name your worries
Step 2 – Find your worry themes
Step 3 – Identify your worry antidotes
Remember there are only two types of worries: ones you can change and ones you can't. So for worries you can change resolve to do it. For worries you can't change refine your antidotes until you have one or two you can turn to whenever you catch yourself worrying. Then just for today, don't worry.
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Are you one of those people who grew up knowing exactly what you wanted to do, worked diligently towards that goal, and are now reaping the rewards? Me neither. Few of us did. In fact many of us still don't know what we're meant to be doing with our lives.
This feeling of uncertainty about finding your calling gets worse as you get older. You want a life with meaning but still haven't found that one thing that you can commit to that you feel will make a difference. You see others pursuing what you think should be your calling but it’s not where you want to be - to follow that path would be inauthentic. How then do you have a life with purpose when you don't know what that purpose is? How can you set goals when you don't know what you're trying to achieve? But you do know what you’re trying to achieve – a life with meaning, and for that there are three simple goals you can start working on immediately. 1. Be Healthy You only get one skin suit on this spirit journey, and the better you look after it the better company you'll be to yourself and your fellow travellers. Being healthy means nourishing all areas of your life – mind, body and spirit. Learning about and seeking out healthier options in your nutrition, exercise, rest, meditation, and positive self talk. If motivation is a challenge for you remember your purpose – to have a meaningful life. Shift your focus to the greater good and think about healthy changes that can also benefit others in the long term. Replacing snack foods with extra vegetables, walking instead of taking the car, writing in a journal and getting a few extra hours sleep instead of consuming electronic content will help you and the planet. Most of all, be your own bestie and treat yourself well. We know how empty words can seem if actions don’t reinforce them, so start doing kind things for yourself – eat healthy food, give your body the exercise it thrives on, pamper yourself with a soothing bath or massage. Continually making small improvements can have an amazing impact on your your health, and being healthy will help you in achieving goal number two. 2. Be Happy Do you know it's actually OK to be happy? In fact we're much more fun to be around when we are. Too many well scripted TV series make us think that life should be full of drama and conflict. That works well to keep people tuning in each week but it's not how real life should be. Forget about what everyone else is up to and do that thing that brings you joy. Can't remember what that is? Then think back to what you loved doing as a kid. If you still can't think of something then go out and try as many different things that you can. You'll get new experiences, meet new people, find out exactly what you don't like, and you may discover that thing you love on the way. Another path to happiness is through mindfulness. Simply being totally present in whatever you're doing. Observe without judging, everything in your surroundings including your own movements, feelings and sensations. Mindfulness is also great in helping you let go of the stuff that's making you unhappy. Yesterday is over, tomorrow might not get here, you only have today so make the most of it. Don’t load up with your baggage as you head out the door each morning, leave it where it is and just for the day be happy. Fake it 'til you make it and you’ll be surprised at the results. By being happy you'll be better equipped to pursue your final goal. 3. Be Helpful There's buckets of research to show that helping others makes us healthier and happier, but many of us don't feel up to giving away all our time or money. That’s because being helpful is a bit like fitting oxygen masks on a plane - you need to fit your own first before you can help anyone else. Even though you're not yet bursting with energy and enthusiasm yet, you can still start being helpful on a smaller scale. Complimenting strangers, giving way to people in traffic, being the first to give up your seat for someone, using please and thank you in your transactions, or just offering a genuine good morning are great ways of being helpful by making someone else’s day a little easier. Once you're fully equipped with your own oxygen mask fitted, you can find other ways to be helpful. Giving something back to society, people that you love, the environment, or whatever is important to you cultivates a feeling of fulfilment which leads to a happier more meaningful life. These three simple goals might not win you awards or give you Mother Theresa status, but if pursued they will fill your life with meaning and purpose. Remember, not everyone's life purpose will become their occupation. Some people need ordinary jobs to bring them into contact with the lives they are going to touch. And each life you touch will be richer if you're healthy, happy and helpful. 30/7/2015 0 Comments Go with your gutDon't underestimate the impact of your diet on your overall health.
This great two part series explains how a few dietary changes, such as eating lots of fibre and consuming vinegar, can dramatically improve your health. 18/6/2015 0 Comments Get the messageSometimes, even when you know the rules, you still don’t get the message.
Today I’m sitting still. I’m in bed with my knitting, phone, a book, and my laptop, and finally it has clicked. I’ve been going over in my head (always a bad place to analyse things), why I’ve had such a bad run of health lately. I had the flu over Easter (the every individual bone aching in hands and feet, 3 day fever, plague version), a cold only a week ago (3 days sore throat followed by 4 days runny nose), and now I have food poisoning which kicked in around 30 hours ago waking me in the middle of the night and continued to escalate into aching bones, intense stomach cramps and the usual other symptoms. Mr Wonderful just commented that he thinks I’m doing the right thing, pulling all my activities into bed and not getting up. “Not much choice on this occasion” was my response, and there was my ‘ah ha’ moment. For three months I’ve been getting busier and busier and not taking time out to rest. Sure, I squeeze in a lot of meditation on the bus, but work has been manic, we’ve had loads going on at home, and my release from having too much on is to exercise. I only took one day off work with the flu (as it coincided with a long weekend), I continued to train and go out in the wintry nights while I had the cold last week, while clearly my body was urging me to ease off and have a rest. And now what do you know? Another long weekend, another chance for me to cram in a whole lot of busy-ness, and my body has decided enough is enough! Stay home, sit still, stop doing stuff, and rest. And here I am. This time with no choice in whether I soldier on or not. This time I’m too crook to go anywhere. Interesting that four of us ate the same meal on Saturday night yet I’m the only one that got sick, so apparently everyone else is getting enough down time. But now, finally, I’ve got the lesson that’s been blatantly obvious to everyone around me for months. Stop! So that’s it for me. I give in, I surrender. Typing this tiny article is about as active as I’m going to get for now. I understand, finally, that clearly I need to spend some time doing nothing. The Universe is constantly giving us signs on what we need to do to stay on our path and look after ourselves. It’s up to us to be open to that information and to act on it when we get it, especially when it’s so obvious. And what do you know? Now I’ve acquiesced I’m starting to feel a little better already. Think I’ll celebrate, not with a 4km walk or a workout, this time I think I’ll celebrate with a snooze. The 7 Huna Principles are a great system for creating a happy and abundant life. They have helped me immensely in my life overall, and on recent reflection I realised they can also been applied to my pole dancing journey. 1. The World is what you think it is If you think you can or think you can’t, either way you’re probably right. A few years back my much younger niece, Bec, invited me to start pole-fit (pole dancing for fitness). I was looking for a fun and engaging way to improve my fitness and this sounded perfect. I was also chuffed that I’d have a chance to spend more time with Bec (win/win - thanks Spirit). I had lousy upper body strength so was somewhat reluctant, but agreed to check it out in a “taster” class. I have to say I didn’t really like it much. I had expected it to be hard and it was. Perhaps if I’d expected it to be easy it would have been... 2. There are no limits Because everything is connected, anything is possible. Despite my ambivalence I signed up for level 1 (mainly to hang out with Bec), but by this time she was starting level 2. Our classes were on at the same time in adjacent studios so we would chat before and have dinner after but in 8 weeks that would end. So, at twice the age of the average student, with arms so weak they tired when I did my hair, I set my sights on catching up. 3. Energy flows where attention goes You get what you focus on. In addition to my class I started going to an extra practice session a week (when my arms weren’t too sore). I called the studio and asked if I could try level 2 and was told I couldn’t. Hmm. A few more weeks passed, I kept practicing, then I called again - I was determined to join Bec’s class. This time I got the studio director. I put my case to her, promised I wouldn’t waste the time of the teacher or any students, and that I would keep practicing. She agreed to let me try a level 2 class. 4. Now is the moment of power Live in the present moment. Let go of thoughts about your past that have a negative influence. Despite being a few weeks behind on choreography, 8 weeks behind on strength training, and those few decades ahead on age, I knew now was my only chance and that I couldn’t wait until I was fitter or stronger. At the end of the level 2 class I spoke to the director again. “Sure”, she said, “you can do level 2, but you’ll still have to finish level 1 in order to learn the right technique”. I’d passed the first hurdle but doing two courses at once? What a challenge! 5. Aloha (love) means to be happy with Praise is much more powerful than criticism. Use praise to foster love and growth - especially with yourself. So here I was, about 5 weeks later, doing 2 classes and 1 or 2 practice sessions a week.. Classes with Bec were much more fun, and watching the advanced students at practice felt a bit like being backstage at Cirque du Soleil. I was getting stronger and fitter, seeing lots of my niece, and really enjoying the studio atmosphere (some practice sessions I had a whole studio and sound system to myself). I was having a ball and it made me glow. 6. All power comes from within Power comes from your authority over yourself, not from other people. By the end of week 8 I’d finished levels 1 & 2 and we both signed up for level 3 together. I had never worked so hard at any form of exercise. Jumping that level had meant making time, getting organised, and psyching myself up for open practice sessions knowing I would be the worst one there, but now I was internally motivated by something I wanted for me (not by anything I thought I was supposed to be doing). 7. Effectiveness is the measure of truth The results you achieve reflect the intentions you used to get there. Having achieved a goal I hadn't thought possible I was really happy with myself. Climbing the pole became less of a challenge and heaps more fun (despite the bruises). I was now in the habit of going 2 - 3 times a week and as I enrolled for level 4 I set my sights on level 5 and going upside-down! It’s been a few years since I started pole-fit. I'm now in level 8, having repeated a couple of levels (some more than a few times), but there’s no rush as I'm still having heaps of fun. These days I consider the challenge of pole-fit to be fun rather than difficult (the world is what you think it is). I'm stronger and fitter than I ever imagined (there are no limits). I know when I apply myself I can master any move (energy flows where attention goes). I no longer see my age as a barrier to any physical activities (now is the moment of power). My happiness comes from trying to learn new moves, not just when I get them (love means to be happy with). I’ve stayed motivated for over 2 years doing something just for me (all power comes from within), and I have more than achieved what I set out to do - establish a regular, interesting, fun fitness practice (effectiveness is the measure of truth) and I also have a much closer relationship with my niece. If there’s something in your life that you’re trying to achieve, be it a goal or a state of mind, try reviewing it with the 7 Huna principles in mind and you’re sure to find a way to overcome any obstacles you might be facing. 8/3/2015 0 Comments It's not easy being realBecoming your authentic self can be hard work. It’s easy on your own and when around like minded people, the challenge comes when you need to go back to those who knew you before, when you were wearing your mask. Their expectation for you to remain the same can be unrelenting, like teenage peer pressure on steroids.
You know that you’ve come a long way and that you’ve changed, but that’s not of interest to them. Like all of us, their world revolves around them and how things in it affect them. Becoming conscious and authentic can be isolating as you begin to move forward at a different speed to others. Invitations to events that were once enjoyable now seem empty, nothing more than a rerun, the same old patterns and conversations playing out. Reminders of past behaviour and habits that you want to let go of, complaints and negative talk when you want to be impeccable with your word, bitching about friends or family when you’re trying to be non-judgemental, and attempts to cling to relationships and friendships that sap your energy. You keep trying to steer the conversation in a more positive direction but it’s challenging. You need to realise it’s more than just what’s being said, you’re actually trying change the terms of the relationship and even if the change in you is fabulous and obvious, some people who knew the old you will be more comfortable sticking with the old familiar patterns. When you try to make a change from the status quo they don’t get it. They’re not on your journey. All they hear is “no”. You feel guilty for saying no, yet your gut knots at the thought of backing down. Why? Because by standing your ground you’re actually saying “yes”. Yes to your personal code of honour, yes to your own spiritual growth, yes to walking away from what no longer serves you. There’s no easy way to handle these situations, they still come up for me well over a decade since my major shift. Friends who don’t want to change the pattern, who can’t think outside meeting on the old terms. Sometimes I’m prepared and other times I’m caught off guard, either way my approach is the same - symbolism and honesty. If you can step back (or up as it feels to me) to review the situation symbolically and become the observer, you can almost see the energy playing out between you. You’re trying to stay centred and grounded while they’re trying to draw you into their drama and lead you back to their comfort zone. As you watch this unfold you realise there is a lesson in this relationship, as there is in all relationships. You now need to have the courage and patience to find out what that lesson is. Time to ask (in a non-judgemental, meditative state), what is the pattern of this relationship? What are you learning from being in a relationship with this person? What are they learning from you? And then, most importantly, how best can you establish new terms for the relationship? Next comes time for the honesty. Have you openly and clearly expressed your need to change previously? Really? If the answer is an honest yes then it’s time to be upfront again about your need for change and your reasons behind it. In some relationships this will still not be enough and you'll find yourself being asked to justify saying no to something that you know will make you miserable, that won’t feed your soul, and that will deplete your personal power. “To do that would not be honouring my spirit” was my most recent (and final) answer. It felt harsh and there was a clear shift in energy but it worked, despite me thinking it shouldn’t have to be that hard. I’m sure it won’t be the last time but I know it will be a little easier next time. I’ll be readier, more prepared and stronger because I’ve done it before and also because I know in honouring my spirit I have moved another step closer to my authentic self. Breaking free of old patterns is hard but not difficult. You simply need to meet it head on with honesty, love and acceptance. Look for the lessons in the relationship so you’re both getting what you really need from each other. It’s much more satisfying than just wishing things would change. Try it. Each time you stand your ground and honour your spirit you strengthen your willpower, building it like a muscle that becomes stronger each time you use it. The more you practice the better you’ll get, and soon you’ll be well on your way to living your authentic life, filled with the things you want to do. No regrets. What better time to create your vision and get started on your goals. As part of nature we are attuned to it's cycles, so lunar new year holds much more power for us to make changes.
The new moon is a time for new beginings. It's perfect for getting clarity around your vision and what you want to create in your life. So if your new calendar year’s resolutions need a reset or you want to make some other changes, now is the moment of power. Create your life - starting from now! |
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